Hope in the Early Light

Bangor, ME Jan 2015

Going on a mission was probably the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. As a missionary, you are not only dedicating yourself to the Lord 24/7, you are learning an incredible amount of life skills that will help you later on in life. For me, the biggest was how to clearly communicate my thoughts. For others, to learn how to be selfless, how to persevere, etc. One of the biggest adventures every missionary goes through is change in general. Change can come slowly so you can do your best to prepare for it, or it can derail your whole life for a period of time. 

Kennebunk, ME Dec. 2014

I have a story of such a time: 

I was with a companion for about 2-3 weeks, when something happened to us that caused a series of flashbacks which kept my companion up all night, causing her to sleep half the day. It was emotionally and physically exhausting for the both of us. We both wanted to get out and work. We both wanted to be exactly obedient. It's hard, though, when your mind, heart, and body will not agree to let you do what you want. While in the process of figuring out how to help this process speed up, I wrote this:

Hope in the Early Light

By: Melissa Blume

The bruises hurt,

the scars are deep.

The memories haunt

and I can't sleep.

I'm in the present

but in my mind

I can't let go

of what's behind.

It's hard to do

but I press on

each time I wake

before the dawn.

The light it brings

gives me new hope

that with this trial 

I can cope.

I know the maker of this light

is the only one

who can make it right.

But until that day

the pain is gone,

I will keep the faith;

with Christ I am strong.

This was one of those changes that derailed us for a period of time, but through our faith in Jesus Christ, we were able to pick ourselves back up and better our route. Life can knock us off our feet. We may, at times, be so scared we can't sleep. Most of the time we don't understand why we endure what we endure on a daily basis. But we know that as long as we 'keep the faith', we will be made better.

Kennebunk, ME Jan 2015

Thank You, Mom.

The poem is called "Thank you, mom" because I originally wrote it for a mother's day card a while back. It has kept coming to mind over the past few weeks, and I feel strongly that I need to share it now.

Preface: I've been home from my mission for about two months now. You may ask, "So are you adjusted yet?" To tell you the truth, I wouldn't be able to give you an honest answer. One day I feel like I'm on top of the world and the next I feel so worthless because I don't have a clear purpose in my life at this moment. The world of a missionary is something no one can be 100% prepared for. You take it as it comes, and it changes your life forever. The world after the mission is something you don't want to think about being prepared for, because then you feel like an unproductive missionary. Once you get off the plane, you find out really fast that, just as you did for 18-24 months, you have to take it as it comes. And your life continues to be changed.

Now on to the subject at hand: even before I came home, my parents did a lot to make sure that I had doctor appointments set up, a bed to sleep in, money to send packages home, etc. etc. There were still a lot of things that I needed to figure out, questions I had zero answers to, but it was so comforting to know that I had help on the other side. 

Over the past few weeks I have been experiencing what it's like to be an adult for the first time, and my parents have been with me all the way. Whether is was setting up my first cell phone, helping me out with my first car, or just listening to me freak out and then helping me be rational again, they have been 100% there. 

I was so overwhelmed the other day, just trying to comprehend the love my parents have for me. 

I want to pay them back in so many ways, but I know that we will never truly be even. 

I also know there are so many parents out there 

who wish their kids knew how much was sacrificed for them.

Trust me. 

They will figure it out and thank you one day.

Thank You, Mom

By: Melissa Blume

The day you first held me

in your arms,

our eyes met

and we bonded.

Each day I grew older

you raised me

to grow up

to be somebody important.

You taught me

that I am a child

of a Heavenly King.

You’ve always shown your love

through your tireless efforts

to keep my head held high.

You were my friend

when I thought I had none.

Through your example,

I’ve learned

everything I need to know

to love, care, and teach -

to be just like you.

Thank You, Mom

I am just now realizing all that my parents have done, still do, and will continue to do for me. It is a debt I will never be able to repay. Really though, when all is said and done, all a parent wants is for their kids to be happy and successful, and for them pay it forward to the lovable grandchildren look forward to.  

So, mom and dad, thank you. So. Much. 

Grandmas and Grandpas, thank you for everything you did to bring your children into this world and to keep them here. 

Everything I am today is because of all of you.